Sure, you love your partner but that doesn’t mean you love all of their stuff nor do you want it having a prominent spot in your new place together.
To move in on the right foot, here’s what you should consider when decorating your very first home together as a couple:
Take an Inventory
Moving in as couple is a great opportunity to take inventory of what each of you own. You can take stock of what pieces of furniture and other household items you each bring in. If you have multiples of one thing, like a toaster or dish set, decide together which of your items will be used.
You can store the multiples of the item for if/when an appliance breaks or you can donate them to a charity or second hand store.
What’s Yours is Mine
Abandon the concept of yours and mine in relation to your furniture and belongings. Being possessive won’t get you far at all, well, unless resentment is your end goal.
Try to approach the merging of your possessions to create a shared space. This means working as a team to combine your personal styles. It isn’t about having equal representation of your and their belongings. It won’t always work out 50/50 — be okay with that.
Don’t beat yourselves up if you can’t agree on everything. You are a couple, not the same person. You will have differing opinions on style choices.
100% of your home does not need to be 100% integrated — it’s perfectly reasonable and healthy to create individual zones. Creating physical and psychological space for each person in the pairing has been shown to support long lasting relationships.
Set & Respect Deal Breakers
Allow each partner to get to veto one or two items — and be fair about it. There will be some items that one of you just can’t stomach. It’s important to compromise in relationships and decorating is not exception.
Create and Re- Make Memories Together
So far, there has been lots of heavy lifting, both physically as you move the couch into your new place as well as emotional heavy lifting while you negotiate your new space with the person you love.
Make sure to savor the experience and enjoy it. Don’t forget to be thoughtful and do special things for your loved one. Just because you live together doesn’t mean the romance and tenderness needs to fade away. Remember that honeymoon you went on? Why not re-live those wonderful memories every once in awhile? Make your partner breakfast in bed, plan a special little evening your first night together by re-creating your honeymoon stay. Think romantic but simple: light some candles, enjoy a nice home cooked dinner, light some candles, even simply recreate the towel origami you may have had at your resort you stayed at! Just because you aren’t enjoying those exact moments every day doesn’t mean you can’t re-live them with simple little touches!
It’s the little things you can do that will show you care and you are attentive to your relationship.
Moving in together allows you get a sense of what you and your partner own. Together you may decide its time to change out a piece of furniture, get a bigger TV or newer model of an appliance.
Having the buying power of two people instead of one means these bigger purchases are more attainable. But don’t go nuts replacing pieces in your home immediately. Take your time to settle in with your current belongings. See what items work well as is, what could use an update and what can wait for awhile.
When you do decide together that you need a new item for your home, make sure to go shopping together.
Even before you head to the stores, check out online catalogues or create a Pinterest board. This will allow you to both share your thoughts and come to an understanding of aesthetic.
Images via Pixabay
Moving in together is an exciting step for any relationship. It reaffirms your commitment to one another and building a life together. But this joining of lives and belongings has its own challenges. Don’t kid yourself that it will be an easy transition from start to finish. Go in with your eyes and hearts wide open, be ready to discuss your differences in opinion respectfully and be willing to compromise.
And above all else, remember your relationship is more important than any of your possessions.
Kacey Mya Bradley is a lifestyle blogger for “The Drifter Collective.” Throughout her life, she has found excitement in the world around her. Kacey graduated with a degree in Communications while working for a lifestyle magazine. She has been able to fully embrace herself with the knowledge of nature, the power of exploring other locations, cultures, and styles, while communicating these endeavors through her passion for writing and expression. Her love for the world around her is portrayed through her visually pleasing, culturally embracing and inspiring posts.
The Drifter Collective: An eclectic lifestyle blog that expresses various forms of style through the influence of culture and the world around us.